How Do You Plan a Move Around a Big Life Change in New Jersey?

Start with the house, not the calendar: what it's worth today, what it costs to sell, what the next place costs, and the one date you can't move. Then put two or three options side by side, with the numbers for each, and pick one before anything goes on the market. That's how a big change becomes a plan instead of a scramble.

I'm Dennis Mark Interdonato with The Dennis Mark Group, and most of the sellers and buyers I work with across Monmouth and Ocean County aren't moving because they got bored with the kitchen. Something changed. My job is to sit down with you, put every option on the table, and figure out a plan together.

What counts as a life event in real estate?

I don't sort people into categories. I look at what changed for the house. These are the ones I see most:

• Two homes becoming one. Two owners combining households have two houses and need one. See combining two homes into one.
• You need more room. Add on, or sell and buy bigger? See renovate or move.
• You need less. Fewer rooms, less upkeep. That has its own page: moving to a smaller home.
• An estate to settle. A house that came to you or to an estate. See selling an estate home.
• Money got tight. The payment doesn't work anymore. See selling when you're behind on payments.
• A storm or fire did damage. Repair, sell, or both. See selling a house with fire damage.
• A job, near or far. A new job can change your mortgage approval or your address. See relocation.
• A retirement date. When your income changes, so does the math on the next home.

Going through a divorce? That has its own page: selling a home during a divorce.

What goes into a written plan?

Every plan I write covers the same six things, in this order:

1. What the home is worth today. Start with a free home value, then I walk the house and back the number with market data. Every other decision hangs on it.
2. What it costs to sell. The mortgage payoff, your attorney, the fees in your listing agreement, and New Jersey's realty transfer fee, which the seller pays at closing (NJ Division of Taxation).
3. What the next home costs. Your lender sets the budget and gives the lending advice. I find homes that fit it.
4. The timeline. We work backward from the date that can't move. More on that in selling your home on a deadline.
5. The prep. You get two plans: sell as-is, or make a few strategic updates first, with what each one should bring.
6. Who does what. Your attorney, lender, accountant, insurance company or housing counselor each handles their part. I keep the sale lined up with all of them.

I tell people what they need to hear, not what they want to hear. If the numbers say wait, I'll say wait.

Should you sell first, buy first, or line them up?

It depends on your equity, your lender's approval and how much risk you can carry, and there's no single right answer. Selling first means you know your number but may need somewhere to live in between. Buying first means you pick your next home without pressure but may carry two homes for a while. Lining up both closings on the same day is common, and it takes planning. I walk through that in back-to-back closings, and the broader options are in selling your home and buying a new one.

How do taxes affect the timing?

Timing can change what you owe on the sale, so bring your tax professional in before you set a date. A few federal rules from IRS Publication 523 come up often (IRS Publication 523):

• If you owned the home and lived in it as your main home for at least 24 months of the 5 years before the sale, you may be able to exclude up to $250,000 of gain, or $500,000 if married filing jointly.
• You can generally take that exclusion only once in a 2-year period.
• If you fall short of 2 years, a partial exclusion may apply when the main reason for the sale is a change in workplace location, a health issue, or an unforeseeable event. A new job at least 50 miles farther from the home than your old one, and a home damaged by a disaster, are both on the IRS list.

What if money is the reason?

Then the first two calls are to your mortgage servicer and to a HUD-approved housing counseling agency. The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau says that help is available at no cost and that you don't have to pay anyone to help you avoid foreclosure (CFPB). Selling can be one of the options on the table. If it is, the earlier we plan, the more choices you keep.

What mistakes cost people the most?

• Waiting until the date is on top of you. Every week you wait takes an option off the table.
• Pricing high "to see what happens." The first two weeks on the market set the price. A home that launches at the right number gets the attention.
• Fixing the wrong things. A Beachwood seller of mine put under $15,000 into updates I picked and supervised and the sale brought $75,000 more in total. Other houses are better sold as-is. You should see both plans before you spend a dollar.
• Two moves where one would do. A storage unit and a short-term rental cost real money. Good timing can avoid both.

Why does a builder's background matter here?

I spent years as a New Jersey home builder and residential remodeler before I sold real estate full time. When life changes fast, that matters: I can tell you which repairs pay you back, what they should cost and how long they really take. And I got a guy for everything, from clean-outs to the trades, so the work gets done while you deal with everything else. By the time we're done, you're not going to have any questions left.

Frequently Asked Questions

How far ahead should I start planning a move after a big change?

As soon as you know a move is likely. A plan costs nothing, and starting early keeps every option open: selling first, buying first, or lining both up.

Do I need to know where I'm going before I sell?

No, but you need a plan for where you'll live. We look at the next home, a rent-back, or a short-term rental before your home goes on the market, so moving day isn't a surprise.

Can you work with my attorney, lender or housing counselor?

Yes. Each one handles their part, and I keep the sale lined up with all of them so nobody is waiting on anybody.

Is now a good time to sell?

That depends on your house, your next step and your numbers, not on a headline. Start with a free home value and we'll look at your options side by side.

This is general information, not legal, tax or lending advice. Your attorney, lender and tax professional handle the legal, tax and financial parts of your move.

About the author

Dennis Mark Interdonato is a REALTOR® and Master CDRE® who leads The Dennis Mark Group at Keller Williams Realty Ocean Living in Point Pleasant, NJ, helping buyers and sellers throughout New Jersey make their next move, with Monmouth and Ocean County as home base. Read more about Dennis Mark.

Keep reading

• How Dennis Mark plans a move around a life event
• Plan it step by step with the free Life Events Guide.
• Want a number to plan around? Start with a free home value.
• Settling an estate? Read the Estate & Probate Guide. Moving to something smaller? Read the Downsizing Guide.
• Have a question this didn't answer? Send it to Dennis Mark and it may become the next article.